When I look back at my life, I see some turning points. The points which change the direction of your life forever. 

I was born in a middle class joint family at jhansi. As far as I remember, I was sincere in studies from the childhood. The funny thing is , I dont know why was I sincere!

I vividly recall that the first time I saw some army men de-boarding from a truck, I wanted to be one of them. Childhood memories are perhaps the most innocent and pious. They make for intersting career choices without thinking about costs and benefits. Alas, over the period of time worldly things corrupts that state of mind. The career choices become rational. As a result, the paths to these career choices are based on herd hypothesis and are dictated by society along with economics of demand-supply.

 Professionally, My life has taken so many bends over a period of time . It sometimes feel more like the destiny or a work in progress. There were different moments in my life, when I felt that "I have arrived". Unfortunately or fortunately, the stay at pinnacles was short lived. And, I trudged along yet another tiresome journey. But, as they say, the real fun is in the journey rather than the destination. The art of living is living in present, enjoying the small joys of life.

In a country like India  where over 90% of population is in unorganized employment, an engineering or a medical undergraduate degree with a post graduate degree in management from the hallowed institutions is still the considered the surest way of upward mobilitty. Middle class children, buoyed by the parents' expectations and burning desire to make it big in the real world, follow this path.

I, too, was lured in this vortex. After 12th, I did a dual degree in computer science from IIT Kharagpur.Let me be candid. It was tough for me to clear the IIT JEE entrance and tougher to be at IIT. Though I managed to do reasonable well at both, but only by slogging and going against the tide through sheer hardwork.

In college, I used to dream to work in an IT firm like google or microsoft. Though i didn't like computers very much, but the promise of a luxurious life led me to develop little bit of expertise in this field. But, life had other plans!

In IITs, during placements the motto of 'suvival of the fittest' comes to the fore. For most of us, it is the culmination of an arduous journey.I was fortunate to get placed on first day of placements at an investment bank.I never dreamt of it. But, it was a special moment. I thought this is it !

The analyst class at the bank had 60 of very bright youngsters. Networking is surely one of the things that happens at world class institutions. I dived into the work straight away. It felt good to be earning a handsome amount. It went on for a year or so.

 Life is like a never ending series of levels. You have to keep on clearing the levels. As soon as you clear a level, you see the next one waiting for you. It's a never ending process for most of us, I believe. It's good in a sense that they say that if you dont go up  then you are sure falling down.It's going to keep you on toes. It's going to push you towards excellence. But, on the other hand, blessed are the souls who have found the ever elusive satisfaction. In today's world where plethora of choices confuse you, true passion turned in to a career choice can lead to eternal bliss.

So, coming back to the herd hypothesis and consequent sure disillusionment; one thing is certain that the stage of disillusionment comes surely. The time for each individual varies.For some it comes sooner rather than later.Maslow's hierarchy of needs also proves that men's quest for satisfaction continues.   Once you achieve a certain living standard, the money earned above a certain threshold level starts going into banks/property. It makes you rich, but the accumultaed money/property generally passes on to next generation as inheritance. Conclusively, it's of no use to you.My father usually says- "If child is able then what good is money accumulated, he is anyways not gonna need it and vice versa".

Hence, After a year and a half in banking, I was seriously thinking about doing an MBA asap. So, I briefly flirted with idea of GMAT/CAT/CFA/enterpreneurship. At the same time to fill the  void of doing something fruitful, I joined NGO called Pankhudi. Teaching unprivileged children at Pankhudi gave me immediate satisfaction. The collapse of the banking industry only hastned the process of me searching for my calling. My family being dependent on me was another factor. All these factors, pushed me towards the civil services as career.In 2010, I quit investment banking. In 2011, I got through the gruelling civil services examination. For 8 months, I worked as Assistant commissioner of income tax. In 2012, I got into IPS.

Civil services as a career attracted me for variety of reasons apart from aforementioned:

1. It provides diversity and challenges in assignments.

2. You can be part of doing something meaningful i.e. building of nation.

3. You get to work at the grassroots.

4. The status and perks makes more than the opportunity cost of pay. Your family is comfortable.

5. You get  leadership position at the very beginning of career. For instance, a DM/SSP is typically responsible to 35 lac population. Also, the man under you are equivalent to almost total employee strength of decent sized MNC.

6. You grow as a person. The thing which doesnt kill you makes you strong.

7. Lastly, At such a young age, the work experience is invaluable. 

My vision of futuristic civil servant is as follows:

I also feel that the time has come when we should rise above the everyday hullaballoo and focus on improving our skills as civil servants. Apart from short term, long term view has to be taken also. Rather than being stranded in one assignment, a variety of assignments in various departments/ministeries/deputations should be taken. Innovation at each assignment with trying to change value system of public is the key. The study leave should be taken at beginning of career rather than doing it in a lull period. Experience in sectors other than government should be actively persued. This will be beneficial for country and individual in long run. 

The idea is to be at intersection of various domains along with solid experience at grassroots. A person who has interest in multiple arenas will be of much more utility than a run of mill civil servant of yore.

Your deeds, which put a smile on someone's face,  gives a kick.  

"Kisi ki muskarahato pe ho nisar,

kisi ka dard mil sake to le udhar,

jeena isi ka naam hai"

The journey in pursuit of happiness continues .........

 

 

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